It has been a challenging couple of days.
Halloween was a good lesson for me of trying to let go of expectations. Anyone who knows me can testify that I like to make things special. So I wanted to make worm jello, mummy hot dogs, and a special drink. Long story short. . . Things ended up being very stressful despite my efforts to space things out. I literally was asking God, what are you trying to teach me, why is this so hard? Lesson learned! I need to not set such high expectations. I get this vision in my head and I want it to look a certain way. I need to be flexible if things don't go the way I had planned. It turned out okay, but the night had a rough start. We took the boys out trick or treating, and it ended up being fun. Isaac didn't even want to wear his angry birds. We had a Buzz Lightyear again, and a skeleton. It was overall a good night.
Last night was especially rough. It was time for Nathan's infusion. It was awful. He was in a lot of pain. I had to hold him down while he screamed. The medicine burns a lot going in. . . Normally the numbing cream lets him sleep
while we do it. Lets just say things did not go as planned, it was our
mistake. The cream was not on long enough. Hindsight, we should have stopped at reapplied the cream. I
was afraid of contaminating the needles because I don't have any extras.
I should have stopped. He got so upset he threw up everywhere. I was heartbroken, I cried with him. I hated going into work today and leaving him. Plus I only got about 4-1/2 hours of sleep. TIRED MAMA.
We went to the store tonight. While we were sitting down eating, Shawn was feeding Nathan her bolus. A couple came over and started asking us about what was wrong with Nathan. We started talking and they were an awesome Christian couple. She is a nurse and he is a chaplain. They prayed for Nathan and told us how he would bring people to Christ and be a testimony to God. AMEN! God used them to encourage us in a mighty way tongiht. I am thankful they were bold to come up and talk to us.
This tired mommy will share pictures and thoughts later. . . right now, its off to bed.
So Thankful!
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