His faith is Never ending

It has been awhile since I have posted.  Life has gotten so hectic with Nathans routines it was hard to keep up.  Starting in March, Nathan struggled with infections in his central line that went blood born.  We were in the hospital much of the time from March into July.  Nathan had 6 different line infections, 7 hospital admissions, with two stays in the PICU during this time.  At one point we were only getting 4 to 5 days in between hospital admissions.

We moved back home at the end of May.  It was bitter sweet.  We miss our family in Saint Louis so much.  We are thankful the Lord blessed us with that time.  My heart still aches for them, but we are rejoicing that we were finally home.

Home did not mean normal though.  We could not take Nathan very many places and we were still very isolated from everyone.  Things got very tough emotionally.  The Lord continues to be faithful even when I have not been.  In these dark times, the extent of God's grace has been revealed.  I wish it did not take these trials for us to fully depend on the Lord.  I look forward to sharing with you the work that the Lord is continuing to me as I continue to be perfected in His image.  This is not an easy journey, it has pushed me far beyond anything I thought was possible.  I have not had anything left physically or emotionally.  It only by the strength of the Lord that I have survived. 

Nathan is doing great, in the weeks to come I will share more of this amazing journey.  Much love from the Walkers, we are still rejoicing!

Rejoicing

Our God is good. He is faithful and answers prayers. 

I call on you, my God, for you will answer me; turn your ear to me and hear our prayer.

Psalm 17:6

He has answered our prayer in an amazing way!  We went to the hospital today. Nathan had a follow up with the cardiologist. His heart is now NORMAL! The thickening of the ventricle walls is still on the high side, but it is now within the normal range. There is no fluid around his heart.  He will go off his heart medicine. 

All glory to God, he is good! What a wonderful father, an amazing healer!!!!  Thank you Jesus.

God Answers Prayers

Sorry to delay proclaiming Gods wonderful works:
We found out this wonderful news this week.   Nathan was born with ZERO t-cells, and non-functioning b-cells now has t-cells. At 3 months post transplant, he had some t-cells! 

We got a detailed report this week of his 6 month post transplant study.  We are still waiting for one component of the study to come back, but it is incredible news. 

His 6 month immunology study shows some of the types of t-cells are actually functioning at normal levels! God is good! We thank you for praying with us. We are amazed at how he answers prayers.  I am so thankful.  I am humbled, and amazed at all God has done.  

Just as I had posted outside Nathan's room:

For the LORD your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory.  Deuteronomy 20:4

All glory to God!

Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name.  

1 Chronicles 29:13

Please continue to pray that he eats and gains weight, and for his kidney function to improve!

Teaching and Learning

I have been trying to get time to post for almost two weeks.  I am so sorry, it is hard to find the time to sit down and collect my thoughts.  There is much to tell.  I will try to post over the next several days to share.

First, I wanted to share of a sweet moments I have shared with my amazing son Isaac.  God has given me the opportunity and challenge to share with him about Jesus.  I have been able to explain that you can ask Jesus in your heart, about how much our heavenly father loves us.  Explaining salvation on a 3 year olds level is very challenging.  I  am trying to explain forgiveness, and what Jesus did for us.  I am thankful for each of these opportunities.  It is a powerful reminder for me.

Isaac is smarter than we think many times.  Last week I told him how Jesus is in our heart, but a few nights ago when we were talking about Jesus and how he was in heaven.  Isaac said he wanted to outside to see him in the sky.  Shawn and I were trying to explain you can't see him.  Then Isaac asked, " I thought Jesus was in my heart".  We had a good laugh.  Our little guy does not miss a beat.

On a more serious note, this has given me the wonderful opportunity to reflect on what Jesus did for us.  I can absorb myself and  focus on the depth of love that our father has for us.  It has also motivated us to read the Bible as a family.  I have also been journaling on the scriptures I have been reading in the Word.  It has been a blessing spending more time reflecting on the Word of God.

Direct my footsteps according to your word; let no sin rule over me. 

Psalm 119:133

Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path. 

Psalm 119:105

I will be more committed to praying consistently for my children, the choices they will make, my husband, and the many changes that will happen when we go back home.  

We have started making tentative plans to go back home at the end of May or the beginning of June.  Please pray we will find the right person to take care of our boys as we can not put Nathan in to daycare.

Grace and Thankfulness

I am sorry it has been so long since I have posted.  Not only has it been busy, but emotionally it has been hard.  I have had some dark moments.  Praise God that he is faithful when we are faithless.  God reminded me today 

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. 

Philippians 4:13

I have felt overwhelmed and alone. I was angry.  God has been working on me.  He showed me that grace is not earned.  We did not earn it, nor will others earn it from us.  God has been showing me to look for the good in others, not to focus on the bad.  He gives us difficult situations as an opportunity to show his love to others.  He also reminded me to be thankful.

I am thankful for my two beautiful boys.  I am thankful for Nathan's health, and how God has answered so many prayers.  I am thankful for how God has provided.  I am thankful for my friends, I miss them so much.  Shawn and I are so thankful for our amazing jobs.  We still have jobs, and they have allowed us to work remotely.  God is good.

Nathans did heal from the infection, we were home in time for Isaac's 3rd birthday and Christmas.  Thank you God!

We found out that Nathan's kidneys are only functioning at 50%.  He has stage 3 chronic liver disease.  This is in part from the chemotherapy and the drugs he is on.  They are hopeful this will improve, though they can not guarantee a full recovery.  He is still only eating 1-3 ounces a day.  We are trying medicine to increase his appetite.  He throws up almost every morning.  The doctors say this is normal, but it is frustrating for us.  He has started rolling over!!!  And . . Nathan turned 7 months old!

I am starting to ease back into work.  This is a challenge and a blessing.  God continues to work in our lives and answer many prayers.  As we start planning to return home at the end of May, please pray for all the details to be worked out.  We will need to make childcare arrangements and prepare our house. There is a lot of work to be done.  Please also pray for us to have wisdom on how to balance Isaac and Nathan's needs.  Pray that Shawn and I would continue to grow and depend on the Lord.

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

Matthew 19:26

We're back

Nathan started running a fever late Saturday night.  By 6am on Sunday he had thrown up at his fever was over 101.  We called the doctor on call and were told to bring him to Cardinal Glennon ER, but that we would probably be admitted.  That morning his fever got to 103.6.  He was miserable.  We were admitted, and within 10 hours his blood cultures were positive for infection.

All we know so far is that there is an infection in his blood.  We are waiting on the type and how long we will be here.  I am praying for God to heal Nathan's body quickly, and for him to be more comfortable.  I am hoping to be out in time for Isaac's birthday in 9 days.  His fever is down, but he has been pretty fussy.

Homecoming: Finally Together

Nathan was released from the hospital Tuesday, November 22nd.  I got to put the boys in matching blue and green plaid shirts.  It was a sweet day.  Isaac was so excited, and it was surreal that Nathan was actually home.  Its great to have both of my boys together.  It is also a lot of work.

We hook all of Nathans IVs up.  His IV nutrition runs from 7pm to 9am, then he has another medication that runs twice a day from 9-11 am and pm.  We have to inject the vitamins into the IV nutritrion.  Then he has oral medication at 8a, 2p, and 9p.  The poor little guy has 6 of them in the morning, and 2 mouth swabs.  He does not like it very much, and it has proven to be a challenge.  There is constant activity in the house.

Isaac loves spending time with his little brother and making him smile.  He even loves wearing shirts that match.

We are starting to get a routine, but it is busy.  I have to take Nathan in for out patient treatment every Monday and Thursday.  So far we are usually there until 2pm.

God has answered a lot of prayers to bring us this far.  He is good!